FUN BUNCH WINNING STREAK ENDS AT ONE GAME
Defensive miscues result in unnecessary loss
OTTAWA - With newly minted captain steve "field marshal" saunders firmly at the helm, and one strong win firmly under their belt, the fun bunch seemed ready to start climbing the ladder of victory as they fielded their largest team of the season to take on "stop hitting on us" at Hampton Park diamond on Wednesday. Things started off a little slowly, however as they were unable to capitalize on some early offense when they couldn't get clutch hits with runners on board and fell behind quickly 7-3. It was during this time that newcomer Chris "heads up" Nicol made his presence felt on the diamond when he accidentally hit a base runner squarely between the shoulder blades as she was running into second. Although it wasn't a hard throw, she reacted as though it was and limped off the field as if she had been struck firmly in the head leading "stop hitting on us" to insist they be allowed to play with six guys since the fun bunch had "deliberately injured their player". The fun bunch meanwhile weren't about to wave the white towel as they quickly loaded the bases in the top of the fourth inning bringing steve "downtown" saunders up to bat. He had been in this situation many, many times before and knew that that he must set an example. With a playful wink he calmly advised clark "pound 'em back" lawlor to "throw it in like a beachball" before hammering the first pitch high over the centerfield fence as it quickly disappeared into the night sky --never to be seen again-- to make the score 8-7 for the fun bunch and give "stop hitting on us" sudden cause for concern. The mood changed quickly over in the other dugout. Tallboys were now quietly sipped in silence --the festive atmosphere dampened somewhat by what had just transpired. They could feel the momentum shifting as they watched gobsmacked and helpless to stop it. When the fun bunch proceeded to shut them out in the bottom of the inning, one could feel a sense of panic setting in, as they realized the cakewalk was over. About this time paolo "slip-n-slide" daros waltzed into the diamond--four innings late--and a harbinger of bad things about to happen. What occurred in the next two innings was a complete and utter, defensive horror-show, as the fun bunch committed a profusion of sickening errors to let the lead slip from their grasp . "slip-n-slide" got the party started when he did his best imitation of bill buckner circa 1986, as he casually let a simple grounder roll between his legs to load the bases with two out. One batter later the ball was sailing over the outfield fence as "stop hitting on us" crunched a grand slam to score four runs which should never have happened. They finished with five runs to make the score 12-8 in their favour. The fun bunch went down in order in the next inning with "stop hitting on us" hardly breaking a sweat. The next inning was more of the same - only worse. The first play was like a scene out of "groundhog day", as another slow roller casually slipped between "slip-n-slide's" legs as he swatted at it awkwardly with his glove--as if trying to catch a butterfly--leading to yet another error and the lead off runner aboard. The next batter, thankfully, delivered just what the fun bunch needed -- a hard grounder to "field marshal" at short for a potential double play. He deftly fielded it and turned to flip the ball to "slip-n-slide" for a double play only to realize--with great distress--that he was standing beside him and no one was at second base. With no option now at second base, "field marshal" threw a bullet to first beating the runner by three steps only to witness alison "bulldozer" hale (filling in for kathie "daredevil" adare who was sitting out the inning) drop the ball like a hot potato. "stop hitting on us" now had runners on first and second--the result of three errors committed by the fun bunch. "slip-n-slide" the ersatz second baseman, realizing his gaffe giggled and said "sorry I wasn't paying attention to the game" as if giggling would help to rectify the hole he had single-handedly dug for his team. Behind the eight ball once again, the team rallied behind their new leader as they loaded up the bases desperately trying to atone for "slip-n-slide's" atrocious errors. "downtown" strode once again to the plate. As he passed rowena "scoresheet" sams, she playfully asked him to "save her a hit"--and they both chuckled at the absurdity of her request. Seeing "downtown" approach the plate, the "stop hitting on us" fielders gulped hard and nervously backed up-- pressing their uniforms uncomfortably into the outfield fence as they prayed collectively for a bad pitch. With the weight of the team firmly on his broad shoulders, "downtown's" eyes narrowed to slits as he dug in at home plate and signaled for a pitch. "pound 'em back" delivered another slow beachball--perfectly timed over home plate. The sound was deafening. As the bat struck the ball, it dented immediately and then deformed, unable to take the herculean force--crumpling up like a sheet of cheap tinfoil. The ball meanwhile, sailed out of the park, devoid of its cover, stitching , and most of its stuffing, all of which had been surgically cleaved at impact. The last two shameful innings were slowly fading from memory as the team dug deep to eradicate the effect of their defensive lapses. Even "pound-em-back" got in on the act as he crunched a two run homer to give the fun bunch five for the inning and make the score 14-13 with "stop hitting on us still in the lead". Another strong four run inning for the fun bunch in the eighth (despite the "stop hitting on us" first baseman deliberately interfering with "downtown" as he tore around first base as they dug deep into their bag of dirty tricks to try and salvage a win) and the game was all tied up 17-17 heading into the ninth complements of some great offense by the team as a whole and some key hits by the women including five hits and three runs scored by Leah "fair play" Morrel. The fun bunch started the inning with back to back hits and runners at first and second with no outs. Sadly, a pop fly and a double play later and their inning was done without scoring the go ahead run. In the bottom of the inning "stop hitting on us" got their first runner aboard and brought them home with a couple of clutch hits to win the game and extinguish the fun bunch "winning streak"-- guaranteeing a change of personnel in the infield for the next game.
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